Reem Omran's blog

Photo: Photo: Courtesy of CNN

I have vivid memories of childhood. The 5-year-old girl with endless questions; she wanted to discover the secrets of the entire world within minutes. She dreamed of being a doctor once, an engineer another time, and a mother of lovely kids. A dreamer, this is how I would describe the little girl Reem.

Days passed fast. Reem couldn't remember a lot of them, but she had some moments left in her memory -- usually the happy moments of her life -- and those memories were the basis for today's Reem, the 22-year-old girl who is ME.

I remember how happy I was when my teacher announced to the school that I was first in my class. I remember my mother's voice singing to me before I fell asleep; I remember my father running behind my kite when I lost it in the air, and I remember me asking my parents for a real monkey as a pet.

I can't forget the day I finished high school; I felt so grown up. I remember the day when the school announced the exam results and the tears of happiness my mother shed when I received a grade of excellent, and then I decided to enroll in the college of Business Administration.

I can call Gaza City the city of qualifications, where a lot of youth are qualified for good jobs. I am one of those youth who is volunteering in organizations, participating in community service activities, getting trained in various skills and getting more qualified day by day. But many young people like me cannot find jobs.

Sometimes, I feel disconnected from Gaza, but whenever I see the photos of Jaffa, I realize that it's where I and a thousand refugees belong. I find myself crying, missing a place I have never been to, but it's where my parents and my grandparents lived. I remember all those bedtime stories my grandmother used to tell me about the land, the fence of roses they had, and her climbing trees and cutting fruits. How I miss that place.

But life must go on. My day starts with the smile of optimism and the plan of my day. Waking up early to go to my university; I have to attend all of my lectures even though some are boring. My friends are a big part of my day. We start with our updates and then go to courses where we can develop our skills. When I arrive home, I feel so exhausted, but still I continue working and studying hard. I am always looking for chances for personal development, whether through volunteer work or at school.

I was offered a great opportunity to volunteer with the aid organization Mercy Corps as a founding member of the Why Not? youth program, and then I had the pleasure of seeing this program blossom into the Global Citizen Corps, or GCC, a cultural exchange between Palestinian and American students. I believe this program is deeply important because it changes the negative impression of Palestinian youth that is too often spread by media.

All my friends and 1,000 others are engaged in this program, which develops our personalities, our skills and serves the community. We use digital media as a tool to express what we feel and what we do. We make changes in ourselves, in our community, and we pave the way for global change. We are thinking globally and acting locally.

My ambition is to be a researcher in business studies all over the world. I finished my B.A. and a diploma of business studies, and I hope to obtain a scholarship to do graduate work in media and development. I am also interested in the field of project management and human interaction management. I know it is a good ambition to be Ph.D. holder and a worldwide researcher, but as Palestinian girl, I have fewer opportunities, not because I am not qualified or hard-working enough but because I am Palestinian.

Usually Palestinian students have fewer opportunities than others to get scholarships, because it's hard for them to leave the Gaza Strip, as all of the borders are closed. But I have not lost hope, and I will not. I will keep trying to pursue my dream of being the researcher I want to be.

It's true that I am a girl, and girls face some challenges in our society. For example, I can't stay a late hour at work. But I am so happy and honored to be a Muslim; putting the scarf on my head is something that I love. To many foreigners, it might seem to be against women's freedom, but I can tell that when a lady is convinced of it, it becomes part of her self-esteem, her self-confidence and her protection each day. I feel sad when the world gets angry at Muslim girls while they are peaceful and happy, enjoying their choices and freedom.

I found that I'm not that different from Catherine, who lives in the United States and whom I contact through the Global Citizen Corps. I have realized how similar Palestinian youth are to youth all over the world. Catherine likes some of the food I like, and she loves swimming just like I do. There are also lovely differences between us: I tried to cook what she taught me once, and she is learning Arabic now.

Maybe our lifestyle is different. I focus on my own development; I spend most of my time working to become a more qualified person with more knowledge and skills. I do not work hard because I am super girl or I aspire to be one but because I always want to be ready for the worst situation. In Palestine where I live, surprises can happen at any time, and I don't want to be caught off guard. I want to make my future secure by being a really good person. I deserve to live.

I enjoy my life as it is now, but I hope that when I find a scholarship and live in the West, I will not be obliged to take off my scarf and won't hear negative comments about me because I am Muslim. I consider religion a personal freedom that is related to your beliefs and what you feel in your heart. I love letting others live in peace. ... Why can't we enjoy peace, too?

This post was originally published on CNN's Generation Islam.

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Reem: "I learned a lot from what happened and in case there is another war, I know I will be able to handle it better. I also became more caring. After I lost many of the people I know, I realized that the people I know might not be with us tomorrow.

"What happened also motivates me to finish my degree and continue my studies and even try to get a scholarship and leave Gaza so that I won't experience this again. Before the war I used to think of today only but now I think of each day as a life. So I have to accomplish something each and everyday."

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Reem: "People are in the streets as if there's a feast. Tal El Hawa is attracting people from all over Gaza Strip to come and see the damage. People are repairing the damage and trying to find a shelter.

"The first thing was to go back home. Our building was not damaged but other towers close to ours were damaged and a few people from our area died. I also went to Mercy Corps' office.

"I don’t think the war is over. I miss everything even things that I thought I will never think of. People are trying to find a way to leave Gaza.

"I am getting sick; both psychologically and physically. We've lost a lot of people and we've lost many things at once."

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Reem: "People are a bit more relaxed after the cease fire although the situation is not so stable. Some people received messages on their cellular phones saying 'Don’t be so happy, even if you are back to your homes you may have to evacuate again.'

"The ceasefire should have started a long time ago. We can go back to our homes and we feel safe, but we still feel that this quietness is temporary because the real problem is not solved. There is no agreement or anything of this sort. The Palestinian authorities think that what happened is a victory; but in reality the civilians are the ones who lost.

"We can move around. People went back to their homes, they are cleaning, searching for missing people. It is really sad. People only talk about what happened and about who died. All we do is call those who lost someone. Others whose homes got ruined are trying to find another shelter. Life is not back to normal. We still hear the planes."

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Reem: "We were evacuated from our homes in Tal El Hawa, Gaza City. We left everything behind and had to walk to Al Quds (Red Crescent) hospital escorted by the ICRC staff. We could not take anything with us we even forgot our identification cards, we just walked out of our building with our hands up, surrounded by tanks and snipers. We are staying at the basement of the hospital. Even the hospital is surrounded by tanks and is being bombarded."

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Reem: "Last night, I could sleep for only two hours. The shelling was not close to where we are right now, but the sound was really loud. It is quieter during the day.

"I feel like I totally forgot everything about college and my studies, so I will have to study hard to catch up. I also want to check on my friends and family. As for the community, I want to be involved in rebuilding Gaza, helping needy people.

"You may never find us tomorrow, so pray for us."

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Reem: "The first thing I do after I wake up is check on my family and our house; make sure that everything is alright. I also call my friends and check on them, for example today I called the leaders of the Why Not? program. They are all fine, but their relatives either got injured or their houses got damaged; everyone is terrified.

"Our neighbors have a baby girl she's one year old, she has been waking up in the middle of the night saying that her things are bombarded...this is very sad.

"We had stored food and my father goes shopping for the basic things during the short cease fire, but still it's not very safe to go out during the cease fire. Moreover, we are running out of cash; there are no salaries and no money at the banks…No aid is coming in to Gaza from INGOs.

"The air is polluted; it's full of dust and gases, people are scared, our building is empty, there is no life, the city is empty and haunted if you will.

"We have never experienced such a thing, we are considering moving to another country if possible and just leave everything in Gaza. We cannot sleep and we do not know if we will wake up the next morning. But the thing is that at the moment it is very difficult to leave home and go somewhere else especially that everywhere in Gaza is not safe anymore."

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Reem: "Last night was not quiet, we did not sleep well, there was shelling and bombing, our hopes are fading away; the attacks were resumed after they were halted in the early afternoon. People go out but my family refused to let me leave the house; it is not safe, everyone is still scared. It is boring, we are scared even if we are at home; we have no contact with each other, there is no school, no sports, no work, all activities are gone. I miss my friends and the university. Right now, I write and make videos in order to support Gaza and express what is inside me."

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Reem: "It is quieter today, but still we cannot go out of our homes and we are still scared."

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Reem: "The situation is getting worse everyday. The fighting is getting closer to our home and the sound of the bombing is getting louder. We cannot get out of our home at all. Thankfully, my family is safe and we have electricity sometimes because we have a generator. But we try not to use it that often because we are afraid we might not have fuel later on."

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